Post by Water Dumple on Jan 13, 2010 22:40:54 GMT -5
I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
I ordered a burger at McDonald's and the kid behind the counter asked, "Can you afford fries with that?"
CEOs are now playing miniature golf.
If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them.
Hot Wheels and Matchbox stocks are trading higher than GM.
McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.
Dick Cheney took his stockbroker hunting.
I saw the CEO of Wal-Mart shopping at Wal-Mart.
Motel Six won't leave the light on anymore.
The Mafia is laying off judges.
Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
Congress says they are looking into this Bernie Madoff scandal. So the guy who made $50 billion disappear is being investigated by the people who made $1.5 trillion disappear.
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, and retirement funds, I called the Suicide Lifeline. I got a call center in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.